The Scrunchie System

If you are wondering what the hell I am talking about... then this post is for you. If you don't recall, a long time ago I blogged about scrunchies... a LOOOOONG time ago. If you missed it... check it out here! It's very VERY vague though. Actually, it's like 3 words. But either way... I figured if you don't know the scrunchie system... you deserve to. So here is the breakdown.

The Scrunchie System (TSS) is a guide for girls to know when it is safe to enter your friends room/hotel room. The color scrunchie on the door will let you know whether you want to enter or not. So here it is... read carefully.

Yellow: This is more of a caution than a do not enter. Yellow means that one or more of the occupants are topless. So you might get a flash of tit... or you may just seem a topless male. At this stage it is fairly safe to enter still.

Pink: I love pink. Pink is the stage where you have made the decision that it is going to farther than just a heated make out session, but you aren't quite to the stage of penetration yet. It's that 'we're almost naked' and 'hands roaming' stage. If you enter a room with a pink scrunchie on the door... be prepared to see private parts... because it is very possible.

Blue: You are entering the dark side. Blue means there is some intercourse happening. The good news is... if you were absolutely forced to enter... it would be normal, regular, boring sex. Missionary... something of that nature. So it wouldn't be hard to started the pair and have them cover up quickly. But still... do you want to walk in at all knowing they are booty ass naked?

Red: What does red normally mean? It means STOP! Think about what you are doing. If someone puts a red scrunchie on the door handle, do you really want to find out why? If you lean close enough you will probably hear it. This is some kinky positions... screaming... scratching... maybe a bit of biting... This means that the pair has entered the deep lust of not giving a shit if you walk in or not. They are humping like rabbits and don't care that you exist. It's hard core... hot... dirty talk... all the good shit.

Black: (I have to write in green because I can't write in black when black is the background) TURN AROUND AND RUN AWAY! If you have someone that is hanging black scrunchies on the door... it means that you DO NOT... I repeat... DO NOT want to know what is going on. This is down right dirty, kinky, nasty, fuckin'. That is all. No making love... No slow passionate moves. It is hard core... putting shit in places that it shouldn't be... bending in ways you only dream of... Sex. *Shivers* So do as you are told... and DO NOT enter.

So there you have it... the scale of scrunchies. The TSS system. So now you know if you walk by a hotel room or a door and see a scrunchie... keep walking. Or better yet... take it off. Then when there friends come and walk in... oh the laughs! I'm kidding. Respect the system because it works wonders when you are sharing a room with friends.

Until next time... hold on to your black scrunchies ladies... I'm not sure you can handle it.

Little tingley things...

I know... I suck at blogging lately. But you have to admit that when I DO blog... and you come look at it... you get happy from the bright colors alone. It's quite pretty in my blog if you ask me. But anyway, on to the matter at hand.

I have tingles. It's been a while. Tingles are good. I love tingles. They won't stay, but hey... its fun while you get them. All you girls know EXACTLY what I'm talking about. All you boys remain oblivious. It's what your good at!

Short and sweet... more to come in a bit!

~K~

To whom it may concern:

Do you not think that it is creepy that you know so much about me? Your life is centered around my facebook and twitter. That is weird. It shouldn't matter who I am friends with or if we have mutual friends. People like me for a reason. You may not... but the thing is... I don't care. You don't like me because of things you think you know. You've never met me and truthfully... it doesn't matter if I ever do meet you. Your first impression is ruined. "You'll get along fine when you meet." means little to me. Sorry honey... one chance is all you get. It's why it is called a first impression. Second impressions mean nothing.

Maybe if you spent more time concentrating on yourself and your life situations than you do on me, that maybe things in your life would go the way you want them. Your friends wouldn't have to tell me that you pissed them off or your obsessing over stupid shit. I wouldn't have to be that persons venting board.

We are adults, so act like it. Grow up, concentrate on yourself and let me be. I could care less about you. You are like the evil stepsisters in Cinderella. Always telling her she isn't good enough and picking on her. So you are the evil stepsisters... and guess what? Cinderella wins.

I'm baaaack

Oh how you've missed me. Life took over... as I stated before... and kicked my ass for a while. But I am back. I have so many amazing things going on. I have some of the best friends I can ask for and more join the force every day. Most of my besties have come from Artists On Demand or AOD related things. Nikki and Vicky took me under their wing when they hardly knew me. We've grown and become close and I couldn't love them more. We've had our ups and downs and adventures (big huge ass bridges in Louisiana and weeks on end living together). Somehow we always pull through and end up stronger than ever. I love them for that.

Ashleigh. Oh Ashleigh. I love your face! You are awesome and I couldn't ask for a better venting buddy. Every time I get mad or pissed of at life or parents or exes... you are there. My Skype buddy for life and fellow TV show lover. The Hills, SYTYCD, and any other show we feel like watching... always fun to blog with you.

All my AOD girls and friends... Monkey girls included. Ya'll will always be a part of my life no matter if Monkeys, Echos, or AOD is around. (AOD will be around... just saying). Life has given me things... a fantastic job and a boss that is awesome. (Gotta love wearing flip flops to work), a daughter who is growing so fast and amazes me every day, parents that support me when I am struggling, and of course... Backstreet Boys concerts. HAHAHA. I love life and even though sometimes it feels like its kicking my ass.... I always win. I am THE bitch and I will always win. Remember that!

~Kristin~ (aka That AOD bitch)

Life...

So it appears that life has taken over and I have failed at blogging. Artists On Demand has taken off and keeps me busy a majority of the time. I am now working a full time job Monday through Friday. Although I love it... I'm busy. But this is just a quick blurb to let you know that I'm alive and well and I will try and blog more. :D

~K~

Florida to L.A. and back again...

On February 1st, one of my best friends, who all of you should know well, Nikki, and myself made a 4 day road trip across the U.S. to the west coast. Where you ask would we be going... Los Angeles. Lost Angeles.... the city of high maintenance, blonde hair, and fake boobs. It seemed to be going well... and then suddenly money was dwindling... no money was coming in... and I missed my kid more than I craved air to breath. So taking in my friends being nearby, a good place for AOD to grow, and an all around fun city.... or my child and the familiarity of home. In those list... the only thing that stood out was my child. So I made the decision and bought a plane ticket, spent hundreds of dollars shipping some of my belongings, and saying goodbye to things I was growing use to... and came back to Florida.

Now I miss California and everything it offered and the bright warm sunshine. Venice beach was really nice too... the culture is amazing. But the smile on my daughter's face when I stepped out of the car was priceless. She has me attached to her hip and won't let me out of her site, but I would rather have it that way than not seeing her. She looks as if she has grown a ton and I am so excited to see her. So even though I might be missing out on stuff out in L.A... there is nothing saying I can't go back and nothing saying I won't go back. Afterall... I did make a promise. And I am getting to be with Payton. All in all... a good decision.

Los Angeles...

I never would have said I would be the type to up and move to Los Angeles. I don't want to be an actress. I don't want to be a singer. I don't want to be anything the normal bunch of people who migrate there want to be. My dream job... President or Vice President of Celebrity Talent. That would be awesome. It's just a glorified (and well paid) booking agent. That would be fun. I would love that job. But for now... I am going to work my way up the corporate ladder.


If you haven't caught on yet... I am moving to Los Angeles, California. I am going to be a Californian. This should be interesting. I am uprooting myself from everything I know and am comfortable with and moving 3000 miles away. The worst part... I am doing the same thing to my beautiful daughter. Her family is here... her grandparents, father, aunt, godmother, and friends. Everything she knows is Florida and I have made the tough decision to go. I will have to leave her behind for a little while. That sounds horrible, I know. But I have made a deal with her father that I would leave her here for no more than 2 months to give myself time to get out there, settle down, and then him and my mom will bring her out to me.


Two months without Payton. I am not sure what I will do with myself. Sometimes I get to the point where I am happy to send her to her father's for the night to get a good nights sleep or a few moments peace... but I would never and have never considered two months. That is a long time. No hugs... no kisses... no "Mommy"... none of that. Silence. That might be the most heartbreaking, throbbing silence of my life. I keep telling myself... it's for the best... it's for the best... it's for the best... and by God I hope it is. That is my baby... my life... my world. She is the reason I get up in the morning and the reason I work as hard at the things I do. I want her to have everything I didn't have and everything she could ever dream of. I want her to do whatever it is she wants to do in life and never have to go without. This is going to be my opportunity to give that to her and for the life of me... I can't turn that down. No matter how hard it may be. I thank God her father is being cooperative and allowing me to take her out there with me. I wouldn't be going if I couldn't. I COULD NOT LEAVE HER FOR GOOD.


We are having her birthday party on Jan 30th. Dora and Diego themed... I think I might know every word to Diego. It's all we ever watch anymore. I can't stop watching her. I watch her play, eat, just sit and watch TV, and I can't help but look over at her now as she sleeps. I think I am trying to memorize every little detail... afraid I might forget if I don't. I'm ok if I don't talk about it. As soon as I let the idea of driving away without her... knowing I am not coming back... enter my head... I'm done. I can't hold the tears back.


It's going to be ok. Just... I don't want to leave her. I have to. I made promises and its for the best. It's to make her life better. I miss her already. I love you Payton Nichole Ann Bonino. Always know that.


L.A. is going to be good to us.


~Kristin~